The Iron Scriptures

Brodin is my spotter; I shall not fail. He leadeth me to lie down upon the bench of iron, and guideth my bar path beside the still racks; He restoreth my strength. Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of muscular failure, I will fear no plateau, for Flextor is with me; thy dumbbell and thy kettlebell, they comfort me. Thou preparest a pump before me in the presence of the unmotivated; thou anointest my muscles with pre-workout; my vascularity runneth over.