The Iron Scriptures

And Wheymen spake unto the followers of the Iron Path, saying, "Count thy macros with diligence, for what passes thy lips shall become thy flesh and thy strength." Thou shalt honor thy temple with protein sufficient, for upon this rock shall thy muscles grow, and carbohydrates shall fuel thy worship at the altar of iron. The Swolfather watches those who prepare their meals in advance with favor, but Brosiris shall judge harshly those who defile their bodies with the processed offerings of the false food prophets.