The Iron Scriptures

And on the fifth day when many disciples abandoned their sacred duties, Brodin wept, for they had neglected that which supports all else. "Blessed are those who endure the holy suffering of the squat rack, for they shall inherit the kingdom of quadricular development," sayeth the Quad Father, "but woe unto those who claim injury without cause, for their calves shall remain as saplings and their posterior chain as weak as their excuses."